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Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera: The Difference Uncovered

June 29, 2006 | By Jack Yoest

So I ask Charmaine, isn't Britney Spears a God-fearing Jesus-loving celebrity superstar? Or is it Christina Aguilera?

"Britney Spears," says Charmaine, who knows all things cultural. Charmaine has the female X-chromosome, which, as scientists have proven, is absorbed from the inner pages of People Magazine. "She is oh-so spiritual," she says.

Not Christina Aguilera?

harper_bazaar_britney_spears_humanevents_yoest.jpg

"I don't think so," says Charmaine.

christina_aguilera_gqmag_wiregirl_vertical.jpg

Christina Aguilera

"Christina, Britney -- How would you know the difference?" I ask.

Charmaine says, "Britney is pregnant..."

"...And bare(foot) -- just the way I like 'em."

Charmaine doesn't laugh.

Britney, the church-going-girl might be making money, but she's not making a difference.



Britney Spears' Heart to Heart
"So, there's no 'Christ' in Christina?" I ask.

Charmaine still doesn't laugh, "You're still not funny."

But she gives a thin smile.

I reply, even as my my extra Y-Chromosome rebels, "Yes dear."

###

Thank you (foot)notes:

Also see NSFW at The Chronicle of Higher Education.

Britney linked by link in Human Events.

Higher Education Titillation.

Str1ppers in The Chronicle of Higher Education.

Real Painted Ladies Gone Wild.

N*pples and Circumcision: The Chronicle of Higher Education Makes the Cut

Basil's Blog has a picnic.

Visit Reasoned Audacity for the Uncensored version ... oh...never mind. Why bother?

Mudville Gazette has Open Post.

Dr. Starling Hunter is hosting the Carnival of the Vanities. So go vist.


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» links for 2006-07-05 from The Business of America is Business
Welcome to this weeks Carnival of the Vanities. My name is Starling, an American currently living and teaching college in the Middle East, just outside of Dubai. It was a rare privliege to get to read and carnivalize so many fine posts. I'd greatly app... [Read More]

Comments

Obviously that b*tch was so wrong.

Lauren

comment: It will be better if you ganna have a live interview w/ the celebrity.

ahhhh hahahaha....... christina is much more daring...than mother britney.....hmmmnn..

Unbelievable. Christina and Brittany are absolutely gorgeous. i love the sensuality they show.

i like Britney. i thing britney don't get a good friend .britney is nice one women in the world..........

britney is much beautiful than christina,i dont like christina i think britney is the most beautiful woman in the world

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Jack Yoest

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